I have shared a number of intense things on my web site over the years, but I haven't told the story of my divorce. I thought I would only get married once! And then I would do whatever it took to make it work.
Well (spoiler alert), that didn't work out. Upon reflection, I think running GameLayers was a big strain on our partnership. I had to learn to let go.
So this week, for The Justin Hall Show, I made a video to share the story of my 2010 divorce:
on YouTube: Sharing My Divorce
Each of my "Justin Hall Show" videos is an experiment; here I wanted to challenge myself to discuss a topic I find challenging and upsetting. After I edited out my long plaintive stares at the camera, I decided I didn't feel my customary impulse to insert illustrations or music. So, it's a 14.5 minute long, somewhat stark simple video of a sad story. And what I learned! And that I survived! So it's not all sad.
Hopefully this video might help someone going through a challenging end to their union. As I was preparing to post this video, I learned that a college classmate of mine Esther Parker was killed by her husband, reportedly because she requested a divorce. It felt like a gut punch to read that news - I was reeling, feeling disoriented and unsure of what I was doing amidst that senseless violence and horrific tragedy. My girlfriend Ilyse pointed out that posting a video that supports people accepting divorce and moving on could be a positive political act - we need to learn to be in partnership, and we need to learn to let go humanely. And hopefully we can evolve to be more supportive of each other as we wrestle with the friction between our ideals and other people.
