marianne sees the internet for the first timeI have a lot of work to do, I'm not doing so fast
she's a middle aged romainian who grills food for us swatties
she asked me I could if I could search the internet for like melatonin
and I could, and so could she be shown a mouse - wild
a dwindling possible experience
watching a mouse virgin
but I planned a party for midnight, and now it's coming faster.
we interrupt our regularly scheduled programming to bring you a
captitol letters on their way out - I don't capitolize much respect most everything on an equal level, uh huh.
but I do still captiolize I as a matter of habit
i've begun to notice people leaving that short, dareIsay mostly women, in e-mail not priviledging i and i.
i like this lowercase world, somehow more gentle on the eyes, seems to be a general direction
not at all like single party politics.
dinner run into marianne
bought not the three dollar for 100 pills watered down melatonin causes nightmares and stopstart sleep
instead the more expensive shit sleep straight thru
party indeed,now it is 620 but I don't feel so bad the morning cloaked in mist in like still sleeping I will hit the bed after brushing my teeth and will have trouble falling asleep because my head is filled with ideas
denise comes early, plays with a cat flat on the floor skirt spread wilson soon thereafter opened three of my beers, saying each tasted flat finally deciding it was him
and then balky who is always a chaotic force powerforce element presence
we're listening to random car crashes recorded and electric guitars a tape sent from a web site reader and this is a freak show I laugh love laugh love
later inevitable character balky would speak of marx, more than once, and some pretty girls would leave the room like liz and sasha didn't say so much sasha sat down next to balky and I knew what she went through and women when towards the end I sat with him as well put his arm around me I responded with a hand on his thigh jump startled not used to being touched he but grasping often so I close and fine touching, rubbing his head, where he had a scalp soft spot on the back
dude, I have crazy dandruff, he tells me not good strategy for more head rubbing and then he's nose to nose and I feel like he wants to kiss me or at least I know he wants to be touched by me and he's so seldom touched and the force of that pent up souls and scoure I reach to stay and resist to force moment by kissing him back with force but stay close and friend arms wrapped and heads solid too much power man weird stuff maynard. I gave him the pair of sunglasses mr seth sent me cuz they looked tre cool on him, must have been a french thing - they look elitist on me
andrea of the impressive cleopatra in the crum shakespeare performance this time last year today in an equally but differently impressive tyedyetophat
and aiesha and nate he came with sasha and liz
dom showed up
yonnie quiet appearance, often smoking leaving
few folks fingering photographs
parties where people mingle mostly with media ain't so stimulated
carew brought vassopressin I took some then balthazar shoved it so far up his nose and asked how to operate the squeeze bottle and people were a little taken aback, like they were when he did it again a few minutes later "just a little more" and there was only so much to go around - she'd ordered it from sandoz
mostly people just stayed for the pizza soon therefore, wilson read a poetic performance rebuttal and took off for sex
but not before I snuck in fire
andrea said it'd make a good song
moments of codified madness after the cool people leave is we stand around and tunnel
like mike jeeks josh and I used to in high school
josh and I learned it on a summer trip side of mount shasta stand in a small group circle arms linked and close hips
one person, hit start a note sound and other match and follow hit tone and sound
when executed comes sound feeling group in your chest, man crazy, and off frequency in your ears - cool group fun sound tricks
actually addicting, we were entertained for some time
even took it outside in to the 2.30am mist swarthmore night and stood
until I found a window to sneak us group now sharon and alyssa augmented into an old building with abandoned dorm rooms matresses the site of even in-our-group hookups history suicide romours
we just we
we laid there together and even mentioned getting sexual with games or truth or dare or something to get us in trouble but nothing beyond some honesty that I actually seemed to gross some folks out sharon did not want to hear about grampa's hernia and dom thought it was crude when I said I would have enjoyed alyssa in a wet t-shirt
while denise restrained and kradled my head in her lap, small space tits on my head
her frenetic hygenine and brest maintenance freaked out some of the more liberated
we moved on to family sexuality and public place masturbation when things developed and body oddities and techniques and history
I was forthcoming, carew too, dom had some tales, denise; scott left, alyssa and sharon held up private, but quite elucidative on the subject of women's body image tyranny and repression.
much still to be done with the site.
so seven am meanderin' in the mist obscuring magic elusive persusive close up near everall vital and green, beautiful only me and creatures early morning swarthmore like ireland