march 3

krusty sez I just watched Monica Lewinsky testify to a vulgar jury,
before a cruel mistress
she's the voice of our age
a new generation, one
singular perspiration for every married man she meets
she's just like the rest of us
surely confused
she's alone in the media world
still seeking attention from you know whose

krusty asks, do you still update
[no, i'm too busy with vagabondage.]

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783907 AMD
[CPU Chip]
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$ 98.94

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$ 50.34

[Graphics card]
$ 44.89 1

$ 44.89

[16.8Gb EIDE Hard Drive]
$ 285.71 1

$ 285.71

Subtotal (excluding shipping and tax):
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I don't know if i'm doing what i'm supposed to so i thought i'd buy another computer. i'll build this one out of parts too, because i discovered that i can't find a fast enough (but not too fast) computer with a mega-huge hard drive that suits my nefarious purposes.

i want a computer to sit between amy and i, to serve our web sites to our respective machines, to act as mp3 jukebox, to store her numerous 2 gigabyte digital video clips, to provide a more secure place for backups and remote logins. for more geeking! for less money!

i'm tired,

brothers tidholm

the brothers tidholm are visiting from sweden, as i expected, gladly and excitedly. Svante has hosted me quite kindly many times in his stockholm apartments, now i am glad to reciprocate. we drank a few beers and ate chinese and watched monica lewinsky, Po was very interested.

I learned a lot - i may have more respect for Bill Clinton now, after seeing her edge and unusual verve. times she would lean the wrong way and all of a sudden you'd see some sort of eclipse of logic take place in her eyes and you could see that she is a young witch unhappy with her cahoots with a seriously wicked old linda tripp and now she's waxing crystal for the pink witch Walters. It's a strange affair indeed, but she is not without her charming ignorant side. Yes! chipperly she reported desiring intercourse with the president. and why not? she seemed very much in the moment, the original moment, the prefaded, pre-lenoed moment of loving big willjeff stud. and why shouldn't she? "he's a good lover" that's fucking awesome. it was all sorts of new frontiers tonight on television ladies and gentlemen. it was a moment for a generation. it was our patty hearst dammit - she's been brainwashed and bamboozled, smuggled away from her comfortable position in watergate with bill bixby and now because of her position she is pioneering legal precedent.

i'm tired to the point of losing my proper mind. so without further adieu, here is an extremely personal letter, experpted from to carew:

amy is great. an everflowing source of drama and revelation. lately she's been on a clean the house trip, which is a nice thing. i tend to compute-out as my enviornment increasingly resembles an information warzone - all paper rubble. but she goes through the dining room or the bathroom and starts arranging and scrubbing and all of a sudden i come back in and she's attaching dead branches to the walls with rubberbands and thumbtacks and casting shadows on them with coloured bulbs and mylar. never a dull moment! tonight we made a video of her slipping in and out of the bathtub under a blue light, and staring into the camera from beneath the surface, and then as she moves in and out of submersion. unusual looking, haunting and pretty looking now as she plays it back on her computer. she's doing some video editing on her computer, it sits next to mine, it's like a nice happy computer couple. i like working around her.

so my next project, two projects,
to extend my home made desk by taking a drawer off a ratty old desk and affixing it to this door i've tinted blue and sat on top of file cabinets. i need some place to stick pencils and rubber bands, a desk drawer, and building one is daunting. but scavenging is exciting! there's some fantastic scavenging opportunities here in oakland, san francisco's industrial cousin.

second, i wanna buy some more computer parts (chip, motherboard, video/sound/i o card, and lots of big hard drives) to put together another pc to run linux on to act as a server here in my house. amy can store her video projects there, i can put my old games on it, my MP3 music file collection, backups, websites in progress, etc. it's nice to have a computer between our two computers so we can share projects. and then i can make it so anyone can have an account and login from anywhere to work on the projects too! how exciting. and sorta expensive, though much cheaper to build and service it myself.

i'm behind in money, definitely, nearing like $1000 in debt. but [uh, somebody] is supposed to give me some sort of severance/settlement for discharging me so abruptly, so that might get me out of the hole, pay some taxes and keep me afloat until april, when i have some lucrative overseas speaking gigs.

otherwise the writing doesn't pay shit. i'm tempted to sell to anheiser-busch, if they are interested, the market says i should get at least $50,000 for it. that would be incredible - i could loaf around and make art with my friends for months, years if i wasn't a fool.

life is nice, i cook a lot. i like roasting chickens, it's real hearty, rich fare, and actually easy to make. amy loves eating them, so it's a nice arrangement. she's actually started making chocolate chip cookies to celebrate this particular bleeding so i'm enjoying that too.

i think i'll probably be here for another year. i got a job setting up an "online lounge" for a web designer conference here in june - it's exciting to throw parties.

music - the fridge is singing a bassy mournful drone.
and "The Drag 'Em off the Interstate, Sock It to 'Em Hits of Dick Curless"
some crazy fulltilt motherfuckin corny joyous shit from JAH thank you!

dick curless
Dick Curless