by Amy
december 2000

why I love Fernando:

1. he plays coy when it suits him, and when you are trying to get work done at the computer, he slinks his way onto your lap and demands attention. occasionally, he will walk along the keyboard and sing "happy birthday, mr president" to seduce you away from the screen.

2. he is a poet's cat. in the dark of night he will curl up on your head and whisper verses from dada poetry (originally intended to be performed by Marie Osmond) in your ear, coloring your dreams with disturbing metaphors that will win you great acclaim later when you write a movie script or epic.

3. he photographs quite well.

4. he is neutered, so he doesnt chase tail.

5. he is a charming stoner. give him a catnip ball and entertainment is yours for hours on end.

6. he is not a conventionally intelligent cat, but he knows when you're being an asshole. he wont let you get away with it.

7. he is all black with white paws and a white belly, like sylvester.

8. he is warm and soft.

9. he is a veteran of the spanish civil war.

10. ABBA wrote a song about him.

Fernando | Carl | life

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