on 11 October 2003 : 08:05, Joao Paglione sez:
Reminds me of many lose-lose situations in foreign countries. Typical dialogue such as:
"Can I if I ..."- No
"If I fulfill your requirement, will I think if i ..." - No
"Is the world round or flat" - No
Sometimes it is better just to stay wet, although that was HILARIOUS!
on 11 October 2003 : 08:32, connie sez:
Heh, heh. Surely you've heard the bath-size dial urban legend...
Dear Maid,
Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine Chest and another three in the shower soap dish. They are in my way,
Thank you, S. Berman
Dear Room 635,
I am not your regular maid. She will be back tommorrow Thursday from her day off. I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dish as you requested. The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put them on top of your Kleenex dispenser in case you should change your mind. This leaves only the 3 bars I left today which my instructions the management is to leave 3 soaps daily. I hope this is satisfactory'.
Kathy, Relief Maid
Dear Maid,
I hope you are my regular maid. Apparently Kathy did not tell you about my note to her concerning the little bars of soap. When I got back to my room this evening I found you had added 3 little Camays to the shelf under my medicine cabinet. I am going to be here in the hotel for two weeks and have brought my own bath-size Dial so I won't need those 6 little Camays which are on the shelf. They are in my way when shaving, brushing teeth, etc. Please remove them.
S. Berman
Dear Mr. Berman:
The assistant manager, Mr. Kensedder, informed me this A.M. that you called him last evening and said you were unhappy with your maid service. I have assigned a new girl to your room. I hope you will accept my apologies for any past inconvenience. If you have any future my complaints please contact me so I can give it my personal attention Call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM. Thank you.
Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper
Dear Miss Carmen,
It is impossible to contact you by phone Since I leave the hotel for business at 7:45 AM and don't get back before 5:40. That's the reason I called Mr. Kensedder last night. You were already off duty. I only asked Mr. Kensedder if he could do anything about those
little bars of soap. The new maid you assigned me must have thought I was a new check-in today, since she left another 3 bars of hotel soap in my medicine cabinet along with her regular delivery of 3 bars on the bath-room shelf. In just 5 days here I have accumulated 24 little bars of soap. Why are you doing this to me?
S. Berman
Dear Mr. Berman,
Your maid Kathy, has been instructed to stop delivering soap to your room and remove the extra soaps. If I can be of further assistance, please call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM. Thank you.
Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper
Dear Mr. Kensedder,
My bath-size Dial is missing. Every bar of soap was taken from my room including my own, bath-size Dial. I came in late last night and had to, call the bellhop to bring me 4 little Cashmere Bouquets.
S Berman
Dear Mr. Berman,
I have informed our housekeeper, Elaine Carmen of your- soap problem. I cannot understand, why there was no soap in your room since our Maids are instructed to leave 3 bars of soap each time they service a room. The situation will be rectified immediately accept my apologies for the inconvience.
Martin Kensedder, Assistant Manager
Dear Mrs. Carmen,
Who the hell left 54 little bars of Camay in my room? I came in last night and found 54 little bars of soap. I don't want 54 little bars of Camay. I want my one damn bar of bath-size Dial. Do you realize I have 54 bars of soap in here. All I want is my bath size Dial. Please give me back my bathsize Dial.
S. Berman
Dear Mr. Berman,
You complained so much about your room so I had the soap removed. Then you complained to Mr. Kensedder that all your soap was missing so I personally returned them. The 24 Camays which had been taken and the 3 Camays you are supposed to receive daily (sic). I don't know anything about the 4 Cashmere Bouquets. Obviously your maid, Kathy, did not know I had returned your soaps so she also brought 24 Camays plus the 3 daily Camays. I don't know where you got the idea this hotel issues bath-size Dial. I was able to locate some bath-size Ivory which I left in your room.
Elaine Carmen, Housekeeper
Dear Mrs. Carmen,
Just a short note to bring you up-to-date on my latest soap inventory. As of today I possess:
On shelf under medicine cabinet - 18 Camay in 4 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 2.
On Kleenex dispenser - 11 Camay in 2 stacks of 4 and 1 stack of 3.
On bedroom dresser -1 stack of 3 Cashmere Bouquet, 1 stack of 4 hotel-size Ivory, and 8 Camay in 2 stacks of 4.
Inside medicine cabinet -14 Camay in 3 stacks of 4 and 1stack of 2,
In shower soap dish -6 Camay very moist.
On northeast corner of tub -1 Cashmere Bouquet, slightly used.
On the northwest corner of tub -6 Camays in 2 stacks of 3.
Please ask Kathy when she services my room to make sure the stack are neatly piled and dusted. Also, please advise her that stacks of more than 4 have a tendency to tip. May I suggest that my bedroom window sill is not in use and will make an excellent spot for future soap deliveries. One more item, I have purchased another bar of bath-size Dial which I am keeping in the hotel vault in order to avoid further misunderstandings
S. Berman
on 11 October 2003 : 08:53, Atsuko sez:
on 11 October 2003 : 11:04, n sez:
on 11 October 2003 : 13:37, Howard sez:
on 11 October 2003 : 17:42, mark sez:
i have a room of four people rolling on the floor laughing over both bathrobe and soap story combination. cheers.
on 11 October 2003 : 17:54, C(h)ristine sez:
on 12 October 2003 : 08:43, Liz sez:
on 12 October 2003 : 08:43, Liz sez:
on 13 October 2003 : 14:38, Damanda sez:
Never ask if you can do anything in a place where there are a lot of employees. Go to spa, grab robe, take to room. If someone tries to stop you say that management said you could take it. No one wants to be responsible for making a judgement call anywhere anytime....and no one wants to call "management" and risk looking like an ass. If you truly are doing something forbidden, play dumb...like Anna Nicole dumb and you're off the hook Just walk around like you know what you're doing...or maybe that just works in LA.