on 1 March 2004 : 22:30, C(h)ristine sez:
For all the suggestions/comments we your readers offer you -- you are at least equally inspiring! At least for me, you get my brain juices churning. And I a delighted to be given the space to comment on your offerings.
Reading your post today, a memory popped into mind:
A couple years ago, someone very wise and close to me told me about a lesson he once taught his high school classroom. He challenged his high school class to a game of "who can eat an apple the slowest."
I wrote about this in my blog (http://www.cristine.net/~cristine/writings/012801.html), I was so struck by it...and it has really helped me slow down (in a good way).
on 1 March 2004 : 22:39, Yu-sama sez:
on 2 March 2004 : 04:44, Lamar Jean sez:
Yo, how could you turn single when you've never even been married?!! Listen, if you ever do make it to an altar/JP, you'll learn so fucking fast just how single you were up to that moment. It don't matter how many chicks you've hung it with or for how long, even if one of them is the lady you're hitching up with. Dude, it is so waaaaay different you can't possibly have a clue. And I don't mean like it sux real bad or anything...just that it's totally not the same thing.
on 2 March 2004 : 06:21, Justin (but not the one that runs links.net) sez:
You should seriously consider adding a link to the comments section from the RSS feeds.
Also, don't you think you are going to tone down your life not because your health demands it, but because you *want* to? Your health is giving you an excuse.
on 2 March 2004 : 14:53, Wendy sez:
It is all quite odd, isn't it?
I have been reading your writings for almost ten years. I'm simply a reader. We've never met, but we did speak once. (I interviewed you via phone. I believe it was during your last year at Swarthmore.)
Even though, intellectually, I realize your writings only reveal a fraction of who you are; and, even though, there were times when I didn't visit your site for months, I have always been moved to care about how you are doing and to get a glimpse into what you are doing.
I suppose, as a reader, it really isn't my place to offer advice. But doing so is instinctive. How can you not feel protective of someone who has had to fortitude to reveal many of their vulnerabilities for so long?
Selfishly speaking, I love reading the notes people leave for you. I always wondered who else was reading your site. Also, you attract many intelligent, eclectic people. Reading their words is as enjoyable as reading yours.
Re: Asking for advice: I think it's all about finding a balance. At the core, one has to have self-trust and be able to, no matter what, have a strong sense of what is inherently right for them. But at the same time, seeking out advice from others, I believe is essential, not just to maintain humility, but to continually learn. I think the key thing to remember is: no one's advice/thoughts/perception are any more or less valid than your own.
on 2 March 2004 : 15:15, justin sez:
"no one's advice/thoughts/perception are any more or less valid than your own."
As you said Wendy, I agree. But at times I find it hard to know or remember what my own perceptions are. Especially after consulting my friends and family. I rewrite my opinions continually based on feedback from others. Sometimes I wonder whether that is authentic, or honest. But I don't have a more authentic source for informed thinking. Truly original thought? I have none. I have thoughts inspired and informed by others. I believe I need to understand better where the lines are between myself and other folks, as you say. Fortunately, the longer I live, the more evidence I have to consider for my character and core values.
on 2 March 2004 : 16:53, Katherine sez:
I love reading your blog . . . you have such a positive energy and it feels good to be in the electronic vacinity of that radiance of yours . . . and yes . . . reading other people's take on your stuff is fun, too :)
on 5 March 2004 : 10:30, Brian sez:
Hi Justin--love the site; long time reader, first time poster.
"Truly original thought? I have none. I have thoughts inspired and informed by others."
I have the same fear. I take in advice from everyone and eventually come to decisions, but agree with Wendy in that everyone has something to teach us. Are you nothing more than an amalgamation of others' opinions? Or are you also using people as sounding boards and repeatedly verbalizing your thoughts? One way to judge a person's character is by his friends and their advice, but ultimately you make the final decision and live with the consequences.
On the other side of things...when giving solicited advice I tend to use the caveats that I won't mind if they don't take my advice, and that I can only really advise them how I would do things. This would make them more like myself, which may of course not work for everyone.