15 june 1996

15 june, 1996

four am wakeup
for a long drive missouri west to kansas city border and busstop
and a very long day on the greyhound to colorado
thinking about sex too much so I practice boner twitching sex organ exercises
stef is next to me we're intellectualizing attraction
my instinct fear of retreat and chased
like why don't you call me back long distance even more irrelevant than college
fortunately stefanie doesn't take

I have a hard on
as an invitation to give me a hand job on the bus
and so it fades in conversation adversation
if we had sex, I'd write about it on my web page
and I'd want her to write about it in details
I don't think she would though, and neither does she
it seems appropriate, if a little seamy
it's the truth - that there was attraction behind that reporting
and then consumation
it wasn't just the trip that brought her out
why are you being so sober she asks
and my brother sez I should let a grown woman take her own responsibility
I'm not for her so ravenous and looking to avoid explaining mobility
the worded eternal sex-chase dynamic
I sublimated when she went to sleep across the asile
I wrote about masturbation, consumption/production and webergy

after endless anonymous reststops
the truck oriented give me hard looks from afar, or a laugh at my expense

stef does occasional yoga

we land in denver
greyhound terminal in walking distance from her reserved hotel
brown palace
fancy, brown and fancy
dinner late at finnegan's
barfood only open nearby

but no drinks served
a vegetable entre and I order cheese fries to put me under
drinks in the hotel bar stymied too by too late
so we order up
red wine and my kahlua and warm milk

I wanted to sleep
drink some watch some hotel tv
so few channels
and we commence to roll around
groping each other
expected

ummmm
she seemed to respond well to being held hard

ummm
I think my uncircumcised cock is oversensitive
her grind on my groin sent me soft for the night

and I didn't mind
cuz her mouth was dry, from sulfites
breasts more bagged than I expected
she sez it's cuz she's thin right now

I guess she could sleep with a bra on

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