31 january, 1996

31 January, 1996

taking folks at face value
can leave you clueless
convicted
I don't need to feel loved
any more than I do
58 e-mails in four hours
the vast most from Mail Delivery Subsystem
returned mail, user unknown
tonight I invited rya's roommate
to coffee
cuz on the energy plain
hand gesture
above our heads
where energy commutes
I send out my energy probes
who responds how
is who I know
how to spend my time

Anne Potter,
I love you cuz you felt my probe
and you said
pft.
unusual and strong.
over the course of an evening
our conversation didn't speed
enough to worry

about crazy chemistry

or carnivorous caressin'
relieving passivity
friendship almost
nothing that required committment
other than pushing love through silence
and refusing to try too hard.
that waited for my return
to a bidden bed bye
practicing nonattachment
I'd learnt too well
from a fair friend
preachin' the gospel
fell victim to her own word
while the kisses sweet
need fosters desire
(or so I read on the internet)
el futuro
el presente
christmas morning is a few years off
santa is obviously dad
now that we've gone ahead
and pulled the pillow from his suit stomach
we shouldn't open his presents

make him return them

he works too hard

to be giving us such nice things
we'd be spoiled
at the price of his endless toil

either that,
or he'll show us the recepits over dinner
give us a georgeian lecture
we'll feel the strength of financial committment
chosen perhaps by acquiescence

honestly,
I have not had a harder cock in weeks
I didn't drive it limp
into juicy possibility
because it was wrong
I've been wanting to make a choice like that
since I studied buddhism

sure wrong is relative
wrong is perpetuating delusion
making false promises
promoting suffering in the bed across the room
when you'll be on the net writing about it before the cum dries.
instead, I make a lesson of it
then I'll join her in selfless sleep
trying as jennifer recommends
to channel my energy through my chakras,
up my spine
it's either that,
or blue balls.

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