oct 19
massage from christianaher massage brings up in me violent thoughts
tales of italian royalty
she is connected
and so I have imagined myself
that if I was born then, or there,
I would consort with similar folk
what a drag
yer house an aging huge museum
having to raise millions to keep the gold lamay up and working
everybody and their cousin coming to you for favours and status
having to sleep in a bedroom state of the art for comfort circa 1533
and where do you honestly bring yer dates?
suck shit.
machine guns lurk in vans behind me
where would I hide
how would I respond to a bullet in my leg?
would I stop running?
would I do damage by walking on a shattered bone?
then the saturday security at the building
what if I just ran past them
and hid in the complex building?
a high priced game
they would not find it funny
using them as a foil for childhood escape and recognition fantasies
come up in one incredible knot in my back
one fucked up spot
she used both her elbows on my flesh
cuz her fingers got too worn out
then we ate burritosthai with dammit and heidi and wayne
in the haight afternoon sun
she is fun to run with
I have eyes for pretty girls,
together we observe solidity lack
there is desperation in so many faces by chance I recognize store "tilt!"
and I visit,
hey, these folks advertise on my web page!
and it's cool!
tons of old postcards, deviant strange archival and modern imagery
I bought some industrial productivity propoganda postcards for the office
work and sleep
sleep because sharp sharp pains in my wrists.
ouchie.
women who actually send jpegs from spacebar
sean plans to spin off the hate bar
where he can be a "moderat"or sean will be glad to see the cafe completed
not for friendship support
but easy pickings
experts agree that there will be lots of chicks there
art school chicks wayne muses on nick negropontiff
sez wayne
dear louis, this web ain't shit til we get some brothers involved.
klezmer with the icb geeks
transplanted from santa cruz to berkeley
in too nice a house for the typical naked hijinks
and a rather unfortunate male to female ratio.
still there is the mackforrest sez,
the mack,
ha ha
sean approaching, or not, girls
we drink beer,
and we laugh about gender
we talk much shit
we carry on
we have good time
fun watching wayne and heidi as exes
definitely more fun than heidi alone
sean talks much shit
scooter and dammit togetheris a cesspoolsean can counter most of my merely pedestrian stories
like today christiana went from thumb to elbow to feet on my back
his kick boxing trainer walks all over himbut when I talked about musky pussy
or clothed panzies
explicit, obnoxious talk
he was appreciative
there's been a lot of sexism around cyborganic recently
uh huh
maybe it has to do with 18 year old girls
and the young men that love them?
this shit is timeless
versus, yeah, man, let's create a new paradigm
I tell you, the more I drink and hang out with friends
the more I am to believe you are kind in action
you talk honest shit
you go with the flow
and the flow is old and rhythms of gender and sex and role and play
are far deeper than simple surmision or revision.
sean practices semen conservation by paraneum pressure
heidi and wayne don't seem to believe in that shit.
man, that's tantra. some three thousand year old shit
the quest for youth grasp and hold
justin hall | <justin at bud dot com>